Lately, I’ve been thinking about the practice of vulnerability. I feel like all of my posts come from some journaling and reflecting I’ve been doing and this is one of them. I’ve been trying to figure out how to be more open to those I want to know me more.
Faith isn't easy. Despite the perception of burying your head in the sand and believing what you want, this world won't let you. There are mass shootings, millions of immigrants and refugees, the deterioration of the earth due to climate change, political corruption, and more.
Lately in the middle of the hustle and bustle of college, I’ve been feeling kind of lost. It’s like I’ve been wandering around, in the dark, grasping and striving for something to all make sense, for my college experience to click together perfectly. I know that have plenty of posts about embracing the present and accepting life for what it is - but this feeling of being lost is one I can’t quite shake.
I have a tendency to daydream, to lay back and have dream of a different life for myself. We all wish ourselves away, not in a dark way, only that we wish we looked better, or were better at school, or were the person that everyone desired to be like. I dream myself unlonely, surrounded by a close knit group of people, who know me deeply and still show me love. Maybe you dream yourself happy, a smile on your face at any hour of the day, able to laugh life’s troubles away.
There are all these timelines. These moments where we are expected to have fulfilled a goal. Graduated. Or employed. Or engaged. Or married. Or pregnant. Our definitions for our lives don’t matter when there are other voices crying out to us their opinions. Sometimes the world is even louder than our own souls. It’s hard to figure out who you are if you’re lost in a sea of everyone else’s voice but your own.