There are all these timelines. These moments where we are expected to have fulfilled a goal. Graduated. Or employed. Or engaged. Or married. Or pregnant. Our definitions for our lives don’t matter when there are other voices crying out to us their opinions. Sometimes the world is even louder than our own souls. It’s hard to figure out who you are if you’re lost in a sea of everyone else’s voice but your own.
We are people pleasers. To fit the mold that someone else has decided for us is our goal because pleasing them makes us happy. When we morph ourselves into the shape defined for us, we start to forget the shape we were created for. The need is please is overbearing- and we’d rather deny ourselves than give up the expectations the world has for us.
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Have you ever stopped to ask yourself whose voice are you listening to? Is your path truly the path you’ve carved for yourself? Or is it the world around you telling you what you need and when you need it? Telling you to rush? Culture is always like “GO GO GO HUSTLE HUSTLE HUSTLE!” – it wants us to be at the finish line. But we all move at a different pace because that pace is best for us. If you listen to the voice of the world, you will always be rushing.
The pace that someone else has set for you can cause you to try and squeeze yourself into places that are not for you. You rush to find that girl group that you love can cause you to surround yourself with people that you barely like for the cute Instagram pics. Rushing to pick a major can land you in a job that utilizes skills that show off your weaknesses. There are pieces of your life that need time to take form.
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Everyone has their own pace for a reason. The timeline defined for us isn’t designed for everyone. For someone, that timeline is exactly who they are. For someone else, that same timeline is denying their soul space to shine. Everything happens at the right time. This I believe – we aren’t in control of everything. And the truths about ourselves aren’t usually revealed when we hope they will.
We all want to figure out our dream jobs and perfect lives, but maybe right now, everything is taking form. Maybe that major is showing you all of your weaknesses. Maybe that job is teaching you the habits you need to break. Maybe that relationship is helping you define your worth and your values.
To force our lives to look a certain way is preposterous. Things form at the time that is just right for them to take shape. Forcing ourselves into a major or a job or a relationship that is on the “right” timeline is the perfect way to make a life that isn’t for us. You may be a people pleaser but it is your life you’re living – live it on your time.
What’s the rush? Why can’t we just settle in the imperfect moments we have now? We all desire the future and to have everything figured out, but let’s not forget that right now is something special too. Every moment has its beauty and eventually, we’ll end up exactly where we need to be.
Signing off, Gigi
P.S. The wait will be worth it.
Where in your life are you rushing? What are you waiting for?
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